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Signs of an Unhealthy Marriage/Relationship

The initial attraction between two people begins with physical appearance and sex appeal. These drivers rev up our desires and compels us to connect with that person. The problem is that these two drivers are not the foundations of a harmonious relationship. In the heat of the moment, we do not consider these things, and this leads to toxic marriages and relationships.  If your marriage or relationship experiences any of the following, then you may have an unhealthy marriage or relationship.

Secrecy – If either party keeps secrets from the other party, it is a recipe for crazy drama. Nothing stays secret forever, and once the secret is exposed, there goes the trust factor in the marriage or relationship. Without trust you will always feel uneasy about your partner, which usually leads to the loss of affection and closeness.

Selfishness – Whether in a marriage or a relationship, as individuals we all have goals we would like to accomplish. In a marriage or a relationship, it is very important that each party supports and advocates for the other in their quest to achieve their goals. This cannot be a one-sided affair, unless it was agreed upon in the beginning. You should never be in competition with your spouse. Your success is her success and vice versa.


Lack of Passion – Many marriages or relationship lose some or most of the passion that they had in the beginning of the relationship. If you experience a change in the energy or passion that your spouse or partner normally exudes you should be concerned. For example, early in the marriage or relationship your partner loved to go out to party, visit family and friends, travel,  eager to have sex two to three times a week, and participates in your favorite activities; but lately, they are no longer interested, this could be a sign of trouble.


Lack of Growth – As human beings we should always be evolving, learning new things, working to better ourselves. Some people, once they get married start letting themselves go. They begin to gain weight, become sedentary, get locked into a ho-hum existence. If you want your marriage or relationship to stay strong, you must grow. You cannot be the same person you were 10 -20 years ago. This is a marriage killer. No one wants to be with the same person for 20-to 40 years or more.


Give your marriage or relationship a check-up to see if any of these issues are present in your marriage or relationship. 

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